I miss that girl who used to write from dusk till dawn, and tame the thoughts she had.
I miss the ruffled hair and the sleepless nights.
I miss my voice, and I miss my stories.
And most of all, I miss my smile.
And us.
There was a time when nothing could go wrong.
There were nights when writing felt a part of me.
There were tears I cried and smiles I smiled, and they all made sense in my stories.
And I could write.
In another life, I was a queen.
And then I was a beggar.
And a fox.
And a rabbit.
My hair was long and my eyes were black.
And then I went to sleep.
And never woke up.
Time grew me branches and roots once.
And then a horse found me. He used to come visit me every day.
But when summer came, the sun set me on fire.
And then I had to learn how to fly.
I don't know where I've been all this time.
Or what I've done.
Or who I've met or loved or spoke to.
I never hated anyone; hatred is too much of a ... dirty and mean feeling for me to actually accept it.
I once met a girl and she told me a story about whales.
So I travelled around the world and searched for some.
And one day a man told me that whales don't like people anymore.
It was a sad and shocking thing to say, so I searched even harder.
And then I found a lonely whale and I made friends with her.
Mom always told me I was strange.
Of course I never listened to her.
But now, after so many lives, after so many thoughts I thought of, after loving, and dancing, and smiling, and crying, and drawing, and singing, and writing, and us, I think that she might have been right all along.
---
Today I learnt that every question has an answer, if you know who to ask and where to search.
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Listening to: Vita de Vie - Praf de Stele
Reading: Getting Rid Of Matthew
Watching: America's Next Top Model Cycle 12, Episode 10
Playing: Chuzzle
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Am o poveste citita, o soapta zidita
Si praf de stele pe hainele mele
Si-as vrea sa culeg stropi de vant
Sa-i arunc pe pamant, sa devina cuvant.
(Vita de Vie - Praf de Stele)
*Click to download song.
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